The Rollercoaster Ride that was 2015…
So 2015 is almost history and 2016 is so close. This time of year always sends me into thinking overload, going over events of the past year and thinking how quickly time has flown by. Today I got thinking about all the different things I’ve achieved this year and experienced. 2015 has been a weird year. It’s been a year of changes for me, good and bad, and has definitely challenged me in many different ways. It started off really well, January came around and I was loving university and doing very well with assignments, I felt healthy and happy, like nothing could bring me down, this carried on for probably the first half of 2015 until the summertime and that was where things slightly changed. Anxiety and panic attacks had been something I’d experienced to a degree before, but this summer they worsened so much, to the point where I hated going out and would prefer to stay home watching Netflix or reading, and to be honest, this has come and gone throughout the rest of the year. This anxiety and the panic attacks that come with it have controlled my life, especially as I began my 2nd year of uni. However, I did realise the effect they were having on me and sought help, something that I look at now as a huge achievement as it has now meant that 2016 is looking like a much happier and healthier year. On a more positive note, I am so proud with the way I have dealt with certain situations this year. I have focused on myself more, and as much as I can, I have tried to put my own happiness first, eliminating any form of negativity in my life. I have recognised all my sources of positivity, be that in the form of friends, family members or even different activities that I do and decided that anything or anyone that doesn’t contribute to my happiness is not worth the worry or stress. I hope that this continues into the new year and improves as my anxiety and panic improves. Small personal goals such as getting fitter and feeling happier with myself are also things that I achieved in part this year. Back in the first half of the year, before my anxiety worsened I was running and doing yoga regularly, as well as eating a healthier diet. This had a great impact on my body image and self confidence and was probably the first time in my teenage years that I had felt somewhat happy with myself. Of course, as the dreaded anxiety got worse, my self confidence slipped away, and as of yet it hasn’t really returned, but it is a huuuuge comfort knowing that as my anxiety improves, I know I can be capable of gaining back that confidence and bettering myself again. Towards the end of this year, early November to be exact, I decided to eat a vegetarian diet, meaning I have cut out all animal meat, including fish. I do however still eat dairy and eggs. This was mostly for health reasons, although given all the research I have done on the topic, it is also partly for ethical and environmental reasons. Vegetarianism is something that has been on my mind since the beginning of the year and I am so proud of myself for finally doing this and I’m hoping I can continue with it through 2016.
I think my main point here is that we don’t know what life is going to throw at us. It truly is a rollercoaster ride, but whatever happens, whether they are good or bad, there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. My experience this year has been exactly that, it started off really well, but then became full of negativity, illness and lack of motivation….but now, I can finally see that things are beginning to improve. We are all works in progress and will get to where we want to be one day, we just have to persevere on through whatever life throws at us first. 🙂
Anyway, I think I’ve rambled on enough about my very extremely boring experiences of the past year, but I hope you’ve all enjoyed the read. Don’t forget to check out my blog tomorrow for my New Year resolution post.
Lots of love, Rach. Xoxo